.”Elise darling, I found your book collection.”
“Collection? The Roald Dahl? God I haven’t seen them in years!”
I read them all so many times I had to tape the pages back together with sellotape. Especially Matilda. And Boy! Boy was amazing. The rat in the jar or sweets! His nose hanging off his face!
“Keep them out. I want to look through them. Remember when you read me The BFG? A chapter every night?”
“No the other collection…” Grandmama said , meaningfully..
“Voyage of Sin. The Duke’s Secret Harlot. Lord Libertine. The Heiress and the Pirate.”
I froze in complete shock. I had completely forgotten about that collection.
My historical raunchy romances. I had a full range from Medieval Knights to Regency Society Scandals. I even harboured some ancient historical ones.
I used to hide them in a cardboard box underneath a pile of GCSE textbooks so Grandmama wouldn’t find them.
Well the jig was up, wasn’t it? She found them.
Oh lord, She must have flicked through to the pages when I’d folded down the corners!
I wanted to crawl into a dark hole and never come out.
“I must say, the scene where the King’s Knight seduces his betrothed without knowing who she is, is very descriptive.” Grandmama continued. “I’ve spent all day reading the entire book! Such scandal. And the story about the earl’s daughter kidnapped by her cousin. The handsome butler turns out to be a nobleman after all! All that time working undercover.”
“Grandmama, I didn’t-”
“Of course I would have confiscated them if I’d found them before.” She carried on. “But I’m not sure I would have thrown them out. What an amazing collection!”
She likes them??
“The Heiress and the Pirate is a good read.” I said finally. “She stows away onto his ship dressed as a boy. the crew find her and the captain decides to protect her and keep her for himself.”
“Oh, I ‘ll read that one next!”
When I finally hung up, Solicitor gave me a funny look.
“What’s this One Night of Sin business?”
“Oh it’s my romance collection. Grandmama found it.”
He paused thoughtfully.
“You actually collected that rubbish?”
“Rubbish? It’s not rubbish!”
“It’s porn for girls and you know it.”
“No, actually, the stories are very deep.” I retorted. “Its very informative about the time period. There are stories based on social class differences. There’s murder. Kidnapping. Did you know that Fitz means ‘illegitimate child of a noble’? Well I learnt that through reading these historical novels. So there!”
“Yes, as in Fitzhurbert meant Lord Hurbert fathered an illegitimate child. The child could keep the father’s name, providing Fitz was put in front of it.”
“So, it had nothing to do with the sex scenes?”
“Sex? God no, they made love!” I exclaimed.
He grinned. “Made love huh?”
“Yes, even the courtesans. They were experts in the art of making love.”
“And what made them experts? The heaving rise and fall of their bosom?” He asked drily
“No, the gentle, yet confident stroke of their tongue as they caressed their masters silken hot member. Their adoring eyes smouldering beneath full lashes, meeting his dark sinful gaze as they lustfully slid his strong cock fully into their soft mouths, groaning ever so slightly with pleasure as he filled them so deeply…
The caress of their fingertips, so eager to touch him in every way possible. Drinking in his pleasure as they sucked greedily.
The low moan in the back of their throats every-so-slightly vibrating his cock as he tangles his fingers into their wild curls, thrusting deeper. Savouring his every sigh as he comes closer and closer to spilling his hot salty seed into their willing mouths. Their eyes gleaming with hunger at the thought of the taste of his juices…”
Solicitor stared at me.
I threw him a sweet smile.